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1.
FIRST CHAPTER I had a poetic approach to things since my childhood, I saw things differently, I was educated to never correct my fault, to never repeat my acts, to never forget my thoughts, to never memorize poems just to write them down, everything had to be unique and this proved to be advantageous, eventually, I succeeded to meet all the people I wanted to meet, learn all I wanted to learn. At a certain point I had no other choice possible than doing what I wanted to do. All this costed efforts, sacrifices, much work, but as I said, brings much joy. Maybe at a certain moment I was « enlightened », and for instance Pasolini showed me a way to be poet and completely involved in the world we live in, saying his political opinion in poems and films, working on history, building an entirely new media understanding of his own and using it. I do things my way of course, but he is certainly an example, a man from the future. All is poetry, poetry is the brain of Leonardo, the way he found solutions and invented the future by looking at birds, water, by cutting corpses to understand our anatomy. Science, mathematics, cabbala, all ca be useful to get a hint of Synthesis. If you reach synthesis you can go methodically into the problem you apply at, and have results. I think being a poet is more an end than a beginning, or is beginning in a cyclical way. It has to do with your basic resources, with your experience. With satisfaction. By seeing how I get mad these days with the idea this captivity -because of the covid virus- is dangerous for each of us, I must admit freedom really is important for me. I am never on the top front between them who are supposed to be right, to know the rules, to know everything. I have no rules, I m kung-fu, I prepare spiritually, every time ready, or almost :) So I know well what means being oppressed by ideas you don’t share, but guess what, I am always at the wrong side at first ant at the right side at the end. I prefer it this way than the other way round. I survived many dangers, you can believe me, and I survived just by trusting my capacities, being who I am. Contradictions are always there, or at least at certain moments. They are signs, or choices to be taken, they mark an unexplored path, often. I prefer to handle them with silence, until I know what to do. It's what it's needed to make sense, like a kind of witness i need the abstract, a lot, and the concrete, i read about the energizing power of rereading own memories, revising my own life, this should free energy, we are energy, the big and the little parts of reality i'm enjoying the exercise, and looking forwards to see what happens next needs meet urgence meet improvisation meet creation meets flowing life meet facing truth meet seeing and so on, but each ring of the chain is of utmost importance, i like when life is essential, when things are necessary it's maybe the hardest way to live, but in this fullness of life is the wonder just a little esthetic moment to enjoy, before we get to the next chapter.
2.
Warriors 07:00
WARRIORS "I was accused of being a utopian, of wanting to eliminate unpleasure from the world and safeguard pleasure only. However, I had put down in black and white that conventional upbringing makes people incapable of pleasure by armoring them against unpleasure. Pleasure and joy of life are inconceivable without struggle, painful experiences, and( unpleasurable self-confrontations. Psychic health is characterized, not by the Nirvana theory of the Yogis and the Buddhists, the hedonism of the epicureans, the renunciation of monasticism; it is characterized by the alternation between unpleasurable struggle and happiness, error and truth, deviation and rectification, rational hate and rational love; in short, by being fully alive in all situations of life. The ability to endure unpleasure and pain without becoming embittered and seeking refuge in rigidification goes hand in hand with the ability to receive happiness and to give love. As Nietzsche put it, he who would "exult to high heaven, must be prepared to "grieve unto death. However, our European social philosophy and education turned adolescents, depending upon their social situation, either into fragile puppets or into dried-up, dull, chronically morose machines of industry and "business,, incapable of pleasure." Wilhelm Reich, 1942, from: "The Function of Orgasm" Satisfaction takes me to talk about Reich. Reich worked on the concept of orgasm as an element containing the premises for psychic and physical health. He worked first on orgasm as a sexologist, after Freud, when he was in Vienna then in Berlin. And then he worked on Orgone as a biologist and astronomer in the US after escaping the Nazis. In his laboratory in Maine, he discovered the Orgone, a sub-atomic particle, bringing an analog of the effects of orgasm. Orgone belongs to the human body as well as to the sky (-atmosphere), so that can be an interchange, a recharge of energy for the body. Satisfaction what is it? It is when you are suddenly recharged and full of energy. It is the result of something good, except in the case of sadists. Reich said he couldn’t heal sadists, that nobody could, and I believe it was because their logic of satisfaction was so inverted, that they couldn’t get any energy from it. Sadists are actually self-destroying people. Reich didn’t treat priests neither, because they fall again and again in the same dilemma not able to escape, he explained about his therapy experience. What I want to say that satisfaction is linked to light, and a work of art too. I continue reasoning in terms of succeeding cycles, Thesis, Analysis, Synthesis, 3, 7, 11, 12. The doubts of an artist, if he found some Synthesis, have to disappear in each of his works, they have to dissolve completely, because the work of art is his fruit, but not his belonging anymore.
3.
Deep art 09:15
DEEP ART Arte Povera is not a big reference for me, not ideologically, even less on the esthetic level. The only author I really appreciate in that movement is Beuys, his premises, his interests, his work, his treaty on Nature. I shot my film « Race », the Purgatorium of my Divine Comedy, in a garden because the sorrow contained in the monologue needed to be absorbed by the earth, and surrounded by beauty. Eresia, my Paradise, takes place mostly in front of the sea, since the sea represents well paradise for me, its immensity, its power and ability to regenerate and give life. But my attention is directed to the human, to human nature. Also the idea of poor or poverty doesn’t actually attract me, I would like to have the budget to build a city made of meteorite walls, like the meteorite of Fukang, and full of fantastic machines. I focus on the power of the mind, of the human spirit, which needs to be developed. I’m very influenced by the Renaissance period, and I start from then, taking all the discoveries made since then, psychoanalysis, psychedelia, alchemy, introspection and meditation, science. To go further. I was trained in Economics, in Ancona first, and then in Berlin. Economics is a quite young science, and what is interesting is, being the world not a laboratory, that it is a half-science, so based on maths but also including all possible human abilities: observation, intuition, creativity, ability to see and predict. Economics considers egoism as the basic necessity of Homo OEconomicus. Man reached a lot through egoism, but it’s time to evolve to something finer, to abilities to connect to the Universe. So of course I’m linked to nature, nature is my very and only source, but I cannot educate a tree as I can educate humans. A tree knows its mission and how to accomplish it, humans are rougher, and still at an early stage of their development in my opinion. I can call my work: « DEEP ART », or sub-atomic art, with reference to the Orgone discovered by Reich. My interest is in emotions and energy. Egoism uses and abuses of lot of energy from the human, consciousness on the contrary increases energy. Self-consciousness is the step further of Egoism, the evolution of the individual from caring just about his needs to caring at his needs inside the Universe. You always have an homocentric vision, you cannot loose your energy, you have on the contrary to concentrate. But the focus on Self-Consciousness lets you be attentive to interaction, and to the consequences of your action. Our era is not gentle towards humans. The clue is reached with covid being seen as a punishment from nature for our sins. I think nature has better to do than loose time in punishing us. What is true is that things which are contrary to life die. Like Reich’s sadist. Dante is a master in counterpointing human action through moral (divine) law. I don’t want to spick over the past generation, I surely don’t want to stop life and economic activity to have a better relationship with the earth. How to nourish a population of 7 milliards? Would we introduce birth limitations? Who decides over your life? Personally, I want to decide over my life, and over the path of the world, I want to feel how things respond, how life answer directly to me to tell me wether I m right or wrong.

credits

released May 3, 2020

ANTONELLA EYE PORCELLUZZI
Text and voice and painting
Text: excerpts from the interview to AEP « The virus-war-conversation/egoist version » by Stefan Petcke & AEP, 2020
antonellaeyeaynilporcelluzzi.bandcamp.com
www.facebook.com/chansonsdamour/
www.facebook.com/antonella.porcelluzzi.58
music and artwork by EISENLAGER eierkochautomat
in studio glasklinge zeitenlicht 04/2020
eisenlager.bandcamp.com
www.eisenlager.net
www.blauhauch.de

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